Client: AI-Scribe.bro (A ChatGPT wrapper that just adds the word “bro” to emails)
The Bottleneck: The founders were trapped in a beta mindset, trying to fix “bugs” and “user churn.”
Our Aggressive Intervention: We implemented our proprietary Echo-Chamber System. We stopped answering customer support tickets entirely and replaced the support desk with an auto-responder that links to a 4-hour podcast about dopamine detoxes.
- The Strategy: We increased the subscription price from $9/mo to $4,999/mo. Why? Because if it costs more, it means you’re a winner. We renamed the churn metric to “Beta Filtering.”
- The Result:
- User base dropped by 99%.
- Revenue increased by 400% because one crypto-bro forgot to cancel his corporate Amex before going to prison.
- 0 hours spent on actual product development.
“They told me my product was trash, my mindset was weak, and my haircut was depressing. They charged me $40k to tell me this. Best financial decision of my life.”
— Brad G-Wagon, Co-Founder
